The Big Dipper is right there where it was yesterday. A full spin has completed and that, among everything else, is still right there. Hanging. Swinging. Laughing at me from far. Laughing at my tiny miseries. Shining like a monster. Lifeless winning over Life. I am a mad man listening to Beethoven. His Sonata 14 is crushing my heart as I listen to it. I have no feelings in the manner in which you have them. Usually, I have no feelings. In this night, I am half on fire for no reason. I am looking at things and finding no pleasure in them. I am half on fire for you. Sweating at places. I am looking at things and the brightness that they are trying to emit and how fast all of that brightness is getting sucked by this nothingness, by you not being here. Where are you. I wonder that. Where are you. My single wondering for tonight. Where are you. Where are you. I have an idea but I do not know.
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