Tomic Riter

Tag: thoughts

  • The Impact of Bonus Inequality on Workplace Morale

    The Impact of Bonus Inequality on Workplace Morale

    As I reached my workplace this morning, my boss was already there in his chair. As I entered, I greeted him and he greeted me back. We shook hands. Immediately he asked me if I knew about the discrepancies being observed recently in bonus credit among employees. I said yes. I didn’t care much. I don’t care much about the office politics.

    As the hours passed, I got calls from several friends and colleagues working in the same industry, and they were all talking about the same thing as my boss. Apparently, the employees higher up in the chain are getting paid more percentage-wise compared to the employees working towards the lower end. It looks like the divide-and-rule formula is in play here as well.

    As of now, I cannot comment much on the topic. Some things are clear. Employees lower in the chain do more actual hard work compared to the employees higher up in the chain. Also, the discrepancy in payout of bonus is huge and cannot go unaddressed.

    The reason for me talking about this issue isn’t just because I want everybody to earn more. The truth is that the policy of divide-and-rule hasn’t been successful in creating happy people, happy workers or happy employees. I think if the employees work happily, they will work in a better way too.

  • Long Week and the Need for a Vacation: Weekly post

    Long Week and the Need for a Vacation: Weekly post

    Today is Monday. For a moment I thought it’s wednesday. Damn. This one’s going to be a long long week. The good part is that I work for only four out of six days. I need a really long vacation away from here. I need a new place with new faces around me. No work. Just slow hours passing slowly. Me having a few drinks in the evening until time to get in warm bed and sleep. Much is happening in the world. Much more happening with me. I’m burdened beyond anything. I don’t know where my days are going. Damn. Eight months are almost over. I’ve done nothing. Nothing. Now, listening to Cohen. I love his voice and his poetry. He was a solid man.

    Today is Sunday. Night already. I thought I’d write something here every day. I failed. I hadn’t much time in this week. I did manage to write more regularly. I travelled but not too far from home. I had two short trips. I’ve started giving more time to photography as well. I’m cutting down on my drinking habits. I’ve stopped smoking cigarettes. September is soon. By October, I would love to bring my life back on fast track. Now, listening to Dylan. His voice takes me to a place that’s peaceful.

    – Tomic

  • Detachment: A hard earned lesson

    Detachment: A hard earned lesson

    There’s a pattern. A beautiful pattern. The pattern repeats itself for days, months, even years. One day something happens and it causes the pattern to break. Sometimes the pattern breaks in such a way it makes a man go insane.

    Man is not prepared for such a sudden disturbance in his life. Man was happy in his world. Suddenly he isn’t. Man was fearless. Suddenly, he isn’t. He is afraid. Sometimes, he is even paranoid. He fears he might break something. He cannot calm his mind. He cannot control the movement of his limbs. He cannot choose the words coming out of his mouth. He is deteriorating more and more with each passing second. There comes a moment when he stops functioning like a sane man.

    There’s a beautiful pattern in a man’s life. Different men have different patterns. But each man has his own beautiful pattern dear to him. When the pattern breaks, the man breaks with it. Different men break to different extent. Some break to some extent. Some break down completely. Some break very little. Some do not break down at all. Detachment.

    – Tomic

  • Embracing the Ordinary: Thoughts from the Bathroom

    Man sitting on toilet with head resting on hand in contemplation

    Like a pig I slept. It’s 12:46 noon now and I think I didn’t get enough sleep. I fell asleep some time after 2:30 in the morning. I usually fall asleep around midnight. Yesterday night, something kept me busy.

    12:48 noon. Im sitting on the toilet seat, wondering where to go next from here. I’d rather sleep a bit more but I shouldn’t. Hunger pangs in my stomach. I should take a shower, get dressed and go out.

    12:53 noon. Nothing else makes me happier than taking a proper sh*t in the morning without much struggle. Sometimes when you take a huge dump, you start feeling somewhat dizzy in your head. Strange!

    12:55 noon. Listening to Memora by Gesafflstein. He is an amazing artist. I admire his music and come back to it from time to time.

    12:58. Time to exercise a bit, not much. These muscles need some movement. Lower back is hurting as usual. Feels incurable. I hope it isn’t.

    – Tomic

  • The rough start.

    The rough start.

    Almost one month into the year and I can already feel myself failing at my commitments to myself. The beginning has been very rough and quite taxing. I’m slumping. Maybe I should go to the altar and confess all my sins even though it won’t change a thing. Maybe I should just stay quiet and keep doing my thing. Maybe I should run away from everything like the coward that I am. Maybe there’s a god for each one of us. Maybe it’s time to hit the bottom and begin from there anew.

    – Tomic. All rights reserved.

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  • How hard is it really.

    How hard is it really.

    How hard is it to make two people talk. How hard could it be. How hard could the hardest of our problems really be. Do they have anything in them? Or maybe we just couldn’t talk about them. Why burden somebody with the weight of our own problems. Imagine a big circle, and anybody could come there and sit inside the circle and just talk about their problems. Sometimes, talking about the problems aloud helps to understand them in a better way. And without understanding our problems, how can solutions be found.

    – Tomic. All rights reserved.

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  • Nausea.

    Nausea.

    Why do I wake up with this damned feeling. I can’t feel my wings. I know they are there. Why am I living with this damned feeling. I’m paying for my sins. There’s a cost to going mad and staying that way. I lay down and try to breathe. Something hollow is growing inside of me. A sinking feeling. I do not wish to fall sick again. I want to fly. Well, that’s far fetched. I want to feel good again. I want this curse lifted off of me. It’s been very long.

    – Tomic. All rights reserved.

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  • Consistency.

    Consistency is the key. To keep doing it everyday no matter what. To take time out for doing it. To keep your vision clear every moment. To visualise your dream every moment. To work towards your vision every moment. To have a single goal and not be wavered from it. To confront your fears every moment, to kick obstacles out of your way. To keep walking ahead no matter what.

    – Tomic. All rights reserved.

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  • Something of my own.

    Something of my own.

    ‘Don’t you want to share something of your own tonight? I mean everybody else is sharing something of their own. What about you?’

    ‘I don’t know. Share what?’ I replied.

    ‘Something that you might have written? I’ve heard that you write. Or you might sing a song for us.’

    ‘Oh no. No singing songs for me. I love listening to them, not singing them. As far as sharing something of what I have written, I can’t do it even if I want to. I don’t remember anything of what I have written. I write in the moment mostly’ I replied.

    The man heard me, laid back and continued drinking. A minute later, he said, ‘The reason I asked you to share something is that I’ve been looking at you since quite some time and I think there’s pain in you and you might want to share it.’

    ‘Everybody is in pain. That’s not important’ I replied with a smile.

    – Tomic. All rights reserved.

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  • Rain down.

    Rain down.

    I would like to remind you little bit of what I am. What am I. Let’s leave the question for a moment. Let’s focus on something else. On what? Let’s stop focusing on anything for a while. Let’s sit quietly for a while. Eyes closed. Breathing as normally as you can. Can you hear the faint noise of fresh rain? I can. The raindrops are falling and falling and falling, probably wetting everything. I want to walk out of my room and see. I refuse to walk out. I walk out. The rain has stopped now. I walk downstairs, stand there, watch the floor, now wet, reflecting bar lights. I look around. Drunkards everywhere getting in getting out. I scratch my beard and walk back upstairs and into my room.

    – Tomic. All rights reserved.

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